There’s Just Something about Bridget Jones
My wife and I decided to binge watch the Bridget Jones movies this week. I remembered watching the first one before and enjoying it, but had never seen the other two films. What I knew about ‘Bridget Jones’, other than it being a quippy romcom, was that the protagonist had a tendency to be fumbling and ditzy, and seemingly always on the move from guy to guy—I very quickly learned I was wrong.
Perhaps because I am newly 30, newly married, and in a pretty settled-peaceful- place, I saw Bridget Jones from a new angle that I hadn’t considered previously. The first thing I realized was that there was just… Something about Bridget Jones. She’s a character who makes you laugh and cringe with second-hand embarrassment simultaneously. Yes, you often wish she had said something else, anything else. Hearing her inner monologue, you sit tense in hopes that she won’t let her first thought leave her mouth. But she is also a character who shows you just how deeply- continuously- you can fumble, make mistakes, and still come out of many situations with your head held high. Or at the very least, that you can dance and scream-sing it out with a song afterward.
Bridget is likely to drown her sorrows in the rainy London landscape after an ill-conceived plan or monologue, but throughout the four movies (finished within a few days) I grew so fond of her and her friendships. When, still in the beginning of this viewing journey, I asked my wife, “which guy are we supposed to be rooting for?” She so wisely answered, “We’re supposed to be rooting for Bridget Jones.” Therein, we root for ourselves. The relationships are often merely a catalyst for change and development. From the first film, not knowing where Germany is on the map, to the last film where she is called upon to help with hard-hitting journalism interviews, Bridget continues to grow and find new depths within herself almost in spite of the men who can make her feel so small at times. Many of us could stand to learn from her ability to be so willing to fail and make mistakes. To try something new, be bad at it, and continue to keep trying. She is a fearless human, who often lets nothing stand in the way of her happiness.
Bridget Jones, 2001
What a lesson that is to learn. Oftentimes, clients come into session with choices that they feel are impossible to settle on. A heaviness lands in the room, a permanence of what a wrong decision may lead to. We watch Bridget make decisions, regret them, stand fast in them, and apologize for them. So often we feel that our decisions cement us in something, but rarely is that ever the case. This belief almost robs us of our autonomy in life. A sort of lack of trust in our ability to make it through difficult times. There may not be an option for a do-over in life, we can’t yell “cut!” and run another take, but we can start anew in so many other ways.
Spoilers ahead
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Spoilers ahead 〰️
The last installment, my favorite of the four, is different in tone from its predecessors. Seeing Bridget and her two children navigating a world without the man who viewers have just watched Bridget get her “happy ending” with. She is back again in this role of chaos and disaster. Throughout the film, it was striking to see Bridget find her joy and confidence again. In the therapy space, this is something I’m constantly working toward with clients, always coming back to joy, which in many cases leads back to confidence. Recognizing that joy is everywhere, if we are ready to seek it and hold it, allows us to be vulnerable enough to watch out for it. Joy is so fragile. We see that within the film whenever things don’t quite work out as planned or hoped. But where it fades it can again show up somewhere else, such as in new and old connections.
People gravitate toward Bridget, not because she is perfect, but because she is genuine. As I said earlier (and throughout the viewing of the movies) there’s just something about Bridget Jones. This is another good lesson laid within the scenes of her fumbles. The people in her life do not love her in spite of these quirky qualities, but often because of them. Authenticity and honesty lead to the same kind of connections. Everywhere she goes, whether in a Thai prison, or leading a bus full of children in song, Bridget makes genuine connections with those around her. She is quick to connect and bring things out in people - and vice versa.
In the final film, she again learns to be the silly, carefree woman we’ve come to love and admire. These moments in the film struck me the most. Her relationship with a man is not the point of the film but is really just showing us where she is in life and what she may be missing. This new man allowed her space to re-enter herself and find the light moments in a heavy world of grief. People come into our lives for many reasons—some to be permanent supports, and others to be pockets of connection. This does not diminish the relationship, or its meaning, but shows us that not all endings are tumultuous or even devastating. They just are.
At the end of the film Bridget says, “People talk about moving on like it means… leaving something behind, leaving someone you love behind. But perhaps it's more suddenly that you see you can live at the same time as all the things you’ve lost, and that you can be happy even without them.” The point of the ‘Bridget Jones’ saga is not necessarily the happy ending. The beginning of each subsequent film proves to us that each ending may lead to a new beginning, happy, sad, or even tragic. In these films you watch someone struggle, succeed, laugh, cry, and love. More than just a romantic comedy, Bridget Jones is a lesson in fearlessness, harnessing the unknown, and acceptance. Although we can’t be sure we are heading toward our own happy endings, movies and characters like these show us that we can indeed have just that, endings and beginnings.
